Friday, 06 January 2012 08:57

2011 – the year in review

What I observed in 2011

A number of years ago I read somewhere that one should be very conscious of one’s emotional state on New Year’s Eve, as that is the energy that the person would carry over into the New Year and it would set the stage for what one would experience that year. So since I read that I have always chosen to spend New Year’s Eve in a quiet and peaceful space. For me, the years that followed were filled with a feeling of inner peace and connection. New Year’s Eve 2010 proved to be a different experience though and so did the year that followed…

My little dog Shelley had been ill on and off for several months leading up to Christmas, at times we didn’t think she would make it, but she made a big effort and there she was tucking into her Christmas lunch with us, as usual. Within a few days though, she had gone downhill again and was admitted into hospital the day before New Year’s Eve. Try as I might, I could not avoid the stress I felt with her in hospital on New Year’s Eve. Nothing seemed to be able to calm me, my rational mind seemed useless and meditation seemed impossible. Shelley came home on New Year’s day just to deteriorate within a couple of hours and then to pick up again by the next day, to go downhill again and then to pick up again. And so began my stressful 2011…

Mid January Shelley made her transition and grief overwhelmed me. I spent days just meditating and crying as I worked through the grief, experiencing the many levels involved in such a process. “The silent witness” part of myself observed that not only was I grieving the loss of my dog but (to my surprise) the loss of my mother and a girl child/pregnancy both many years ago. As I observed the deeper levels of this grief I realised that I was releasing grief that I had (unknowingly) suppressed for all those years – somehow Shelley’s passing had unlocked all of that so that it could be cleared away and processed more fully now that I had the level of awareness to do so. Shelley had always felt more than “just a dog” – she truly had felt like both mother and daughter. In my meditations I was shown that this was a female line ancestral clearing and I was given much understanding about how everything linked together – how when we can see beneath the surface of a situation there is always so much more at play.

A month later, I was rushed into hospital with a condition very similar to that which Shelley had died from – I had no prior symptoms or warning, it literally happened overnight, one month to the day. So here I was now, about to enter the Medical System and my “silent witness” sprung into action once again, giving me a running commentary of the things I needed to be aware of. (see April 2011 newsletter “Information Express”). This was the last level of the ancestral clearing coming through on a physical level now to finally be released.

I had decided to take on a course of study through 2011 so I also found myself in the Education System once again. Having missed the first few weeks of the course due to being in hospital etc I had a fair amount of work to catch up on and I found it very difficult to get back into this type of study. I had a couple of really great and inspirational teachers and I loved what I was studying but as the year went on I began to see the hidden layers of the Education System and the Governmental restrictions that are put in place for various reasons, many of which I am sure would be labelled as a conspiracy theory… It was disappointing to see such controls in a place that I thought would be all about opening one’s mind and again it showed me beneath the surface.

Half way through the year I added on an extra subject to my workload – it’s a subject in which I already hold a B.Sc, but for various reasons I needed to complete again (!) and to be honest as I already had a complete working knowledge of the subject I thought I would be able to bump it off quite quickly and easily but to sit in that classroom was the hardest thing for me… I was hearing information coming from the teacher via reference books, published research articles and scientific studies that every cell in my body knew was hogwash. Some of the information was completely in opposition to what I had learned previously and also contradicted information put forward in the two other two subjects I was studying. My guides were up in arms about this and telling me that the research was biased and the studies flawed (and to not take this information on) and yet in order to pass this exam I knew that I was being programmed, in a way, to learn and know this information. I raised many questions in class about the authenticity of some of the claims and research and I was shut down (it felt like shot down!). At one point the teacher actually said to me that “not everything is a conspiracy Karen!”. I had not brought the subject of conspiracy into the classroom… I wonder how that word got in there, though my guides were smiling saying “yes, everything reveals itself in due course…” I was extremely disappointed at the amount of disinformation that was put out there and prompts me to stress the need to educate yourself via many different sources, be open to opinions outside of the mainstream and trust your inner guidance. Most importantly, when something feels “off” – trust that feeling. Not all of the people who deliver disinformation are aware that they are doing so – it’s just another level of the masking that goes on here in this 3D reality.

What I observed from this experience is that, the Education System is not a place for me and it does not produce creative thinkers. In the classroom I was being asked to work from a very left brain mental level of myself when for years I have been working from my right brain and through my heart. It was very hard for me to get back into my head in that way and I could see and feel a type of fragmenting going on inside of me. Because so much of my daytime was taken up with being in the mental level, my night-time was spent catching up with information that my guidance wanted me to know and my sleep-time was very disrupted. It made it very difficult for me to be as calm and centred as I usually am and I began to feel huge amounts of stress and internal panic beginning to build within me. It was interesting to observe myself going through the feelings whilst at the same time knowing that it’s not really who I am. It took a concerted effort though not to spin out at times and I pondered that this might be the type of feeling that sends many people off running to the doctor for anti-depressants and sleeping tablets. I was grateful that I could observe this in action and not be swept away with it, thereby avoiding my own trip to the doctor! While I loved the course on one level, I knew it was detrimental to most of the other parts of my Self and I was extremely thankful that I was almost at the end of the year when this realisation finally came through. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that had it not been for the space held by those two wonderful teachers, and the personal experiential information they shared with me (of an energetic nature and therefore appealing to my right brain), I would not have been able to see the year through.

This year in the classroom it became very clear to me that I was not in the right place – I experienced that personally – and I would suggest that if you are feeling similar stress that you ask (and answer yourself very truthfully) “Am I in the right place?”. If you are not then you need to put a (short) time frame in place for when you will move yourself out of that wrong place. You can’t hold out indefinitely, you will need to move otherwise you will be setting up a situation that will definitely prove to be detrimental to your health on some level – the only question is “when?”. The quicker you can move away from the wrong place, the better.

Sometimes you just have to go through something personally to really understand it, you have to live it to embody it and you have to feel it to heal it. I experienced a great deal this year, I learned an awful lot and more than anything else I have learned to let nothing come in between your connection with your Self and God, for only in that place will you find inner peace and love.

For me 2011 was a very tiring year. I would say that most of the people I spoke to at my stand at the Mind Body and Spirit Exhibition (Sydney) in November 2011 echoed that in their personal lives too, as have many of my clients and friends. I see now that 2011 was another level of our Mastership training. I sense that 2012 will be an even bigger year in terms of the shifts and changes that will occur before we are fully through to the other end of this birthing process into a new reality and a new age.

New Year’s Eve 2011 for me was spent in quiet contemplation of what I had learned and experienced that year. I felt at peace with all that I had been through and the challenges that I had faced and I gave gratitude for the many beautiful things that had come into my life. To be sure in 2011 I had also experienced much beauty and love and a profound connection to Mother Earth.

So if one’s emotional state on New Year’s Eve does set the stage for what one experiences the following year, so far 2012 looks pretty good…

Blessings,

Karen

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